Skye, We're Screwed
by EnjoytheSilence03
Summary: Old Story. Didn't have the heart to delete it.
1. Prologue: Mr Cubey

"Skye stay away from the Nintendo!"

"Danielle you've been trying to do this for the past 30 minutes and, you promised after this you would stop so we can go eat!"

"I lied!"

"LOOK EPONA AIN'T GOING OVER THE FENCES ANY FASTER AND I'M HUGRY SO SAY GOOD BYE TO ZELDA!"

"NO SKYE GET AWAY FROM IT!" two girls sat in front of their TV playing Zelda until………

"STOP SKYE!"

"IT'S COMING OUT!"

"NEVER!"

The taller girl started struggling as her shorter friend was hanging on to her back in a pathetic attempt to save her game.

"SKYE YOU BITCH!" she shouted as her companion hit the Zelda game out of place causing it to freeze. "LEARN PATIENCE!" the black-eyed girl screamed at her best friend as she got pulled off to the kitchen to get dinner.

"I HAVE PATIENTENCE, BUT IT WAS GONE AFTER THE 13th TIME YOU ATTEMPTED TO BEAT THE STUPID RECORD!" Danielle shut up even though they both knew that was a bunch of bullshit. Skye the taller one by about 3 inches, was never patient and was always quick to start yelling, but she, unlike her friend, was a little mental at times. Like when she would go up to people in the mall and randomly hug them, telling them how much she liked pickles. Of course, Danielle would be somewhere close by, behind a column, fountain or something laughing her ass off at the people's disturbed looks directed at her friend.

"Danielle the rice is in a block."

"That's because it's frozen smart ass."

"WAIT, don't touch it! It looks so cute it's in little cube, it's like CUBEY!" Skye explained with a series of random hand movements.

"Uh-huh, say good bye to Mr. Cubey Skye 'cause it's going in the microwave now." Danielle said as she quickly grabbed the plate out of her friend's hands and slammed the microwave door shut, hitting start. She went back to get some plates as her friend mourned the loss of 'Mr. Cubey'.

--10 minutes later and three spills of soy sauce--

"This chicken is pretty good."

"Thank you."

"The compliment was directed towards your mom who actually made it."

"Point?"

"Never mind."

"SKYE WATCH IT!"

"huh?" thud

"owwww…"

"I told you to watch out, it was your own fault you failed to notice the foot rest."

"Stupid fucking pieces of shit…" Skye continued to mumble incoherent words under her breath as she stood up and brushed herself off.

"OH FUCK SKYE!"

"What?"

"YOU SPILLED DR. PEPPER ON THE NINTENDO!"

"Oh shit."

"DON'T STAND THERE GO GET PAPER TOWELS!"

"Got it………by the way where are they?"

"THERE NEXT TO THE TV, YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT!"

"WELL I DON'T LIVE HERE!"

"You do almost every other weekend."

"True……" the blue eyed girl mumbled, turning to her friend. "Here…………..hey Danielle was the TV on before?"

"I don't know, I really don't care, my Zelda game could be dead! LIVE! LIVE!" Danielle shouted at her game as Skye just gave the TV a weird look, she could have sworn it was off before-

"SKYE I SWEAR IF IT'S BROKEN IM GOING TO KILL YOU! I HAD ONE TEMPLE LEFT, ONE TEMPLE!" Danielle roughly shook her friend.

"Hey Danny?"

"WHAT!"

"Is it supposed to do that?"

"Huh……………OH SHIT!" The two friends watched, one in horror, the other in amusement, as the Nintendo began shooting sparks.

"NOOOO!" Danielle screamed as she tried to save her Nintendo.

"Don't touch it!" Skye grabbed on to her friends arm as her hand just came in contact with the sparking Nintendo. Everything went black…………


	2. Houston, We have a problem

**Hey people, sorry I haven't updated in like….forever due to midterms and my mad procrastination skills! Anyway, I will be getting a lot more out during Christmas break, especially since I'm going skiing with my editor coughDeathMeetsLifecough Enjoy!**

* * *

"Mmmmm…" The green-eyed girl began to stir. 

The two girls lay, in the middle of a forest, unconscious, until…

/plop/

"WHAT THE HELL!" /birds take flight/

"Stupid acorn… stupid tree that produced it …stupid higher being who created trees… stupid… wait this is beginning to sound like Jane Crofut's letter." The tall girl went on to mumble about stupid 8th grade English teachers, and pointless books read in their classes, all while she nursed her forehead, which had been brutally assaulted by the vicious acorn.

"Wait a second… where am I?" she wondered aloud as she finally became aware of her surroundings. From what she could tell, she was in a small clearing in the middle of some vast forest, her somewhat smaller friend still unconscious next to her.

"Dani. Dan-i. Neko-chan. OI NEKO-CHAN!" the black-eyed girl rolled over, proceeding to bury her head in her arms before finally going back to sleep.

"Damn you and your inability to wake up." Skye, casting one last glare at her peaceful friend, stood up and continued to further examine her surroundings.

"Well this certainly isn't Houston… maybe somewhere in east Texas…"

"Oooooo, A BLUE FLOWER… wait if it isn't a bluebonnet, what else could it be? I've never heard of any other blue flowers, if there are I'm sure Neko would have told me along time ago. Ooooh well, I can use it for bait to get her up." The naïve brunette began to bend down to pick the 'flower', but when her finger got into a 10 cm radius of the 'flower', something happened. The term 'flower', now, would not be a very good description for what stood before her. The once small and somewhat pretty blue bud had grown to the size bigger then that of her head, and the small stem it had once been attached to grew about 6 ft.

"WHAT-" /deep breath/

"THE-" /deep breath/

"FUCK!" The teenage girl, now scared shitless, fell on her ass, and did the only thing she knew how to, scream as many profanities, in as many languages, that she physically knew.

_**5 minutes later**_

"FUCKING GREEN, SO NOT FLOWER, DAMN FUCKING THING! I HOPE YOU BURN IN FUCKING HELL WITH THE REST OF YOUR FUCKING GREEN KILLER FLOWER THINGS!" /breaks to breathe/

"AND YOU WILL NOT BE ANYWHERE NEAR MY PENTHOUSE! I WILL TALK TO MR. S AND HAVE IT SO YOU WILL BE AS FUCKING FAR AWAY FROM MY AWSOME BEYOND AWSOME PENTHOUSE AS FUCKING POSSIBLE! YOU WILL SO BE BANISHED TO THE GHETTO NEIGHBORHOOD WITH EVERYONE ELSE WHO ANGERS THE GODS OF SKYEISM! YOUR KIDS ARE PROBABLY AS-" /plop/dying noise/shrivels and then disappears/ Skye curiously looked up to find her once sleeping friend face turning red, and her fists clenched.

"Ok for starters, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!" she screamed, picking her friend up non-so gently by the collar.

"…A mutated blue-bonnet?" Skye tried, smiling nervously.

"WHAT DID YOU DO!" Her friend cried, profusely shaking the dark brunette.

"NOTHNG! I did NOTHING! You can't blame this one on me, I just woke up here!" Her friend said back, folding her arms across her chest, glaring fiercely at her best friend, whom, might I add, was still holding her up, shaking her every few seconds. How she was doing this is interesting, considering Skye is about 3 inches taller than herself, but what can you expect, have you ever tried waking up to your friend cussing out an evil science project?

"Where is here…?" Dani asked as realization hit her, and she began to absorb her surroundings. In the process she managed to 'place' Skye on back on the ground. (DeathMeetsLife- /cough/drop/cough/)

"A forest?" Skye replied, brushing herself off and getting up, joining her friend in inspecting their present location.

"No shit," The black-eyed girl returned sarcastically, side-glancing at her friend in her usual blank expression, and then returning back to examining the scenery. Somewhere to left an owl began hooting, while in the bushes off to the right something was moving. In the distance, the faint sound of a howl echoed throughout the forest. A small sweatdrop appeared on the back of each teenager's head as they looked out into the dark and foreboding wood. One word rang through each of their heads _Classic_.

"Well I guess we better get going, ne?" Skye stated, but kept her eyes on the surrounding forest, not completely trusting what lay beyond the clearing. After minutes of silence, both teenagers glanced at one another from the corner of their eyes.

"Lead the way," Dani replied, finally breaking the menacing silence, her trademark smartass smirk plastered on her face while gesturing for Skye to go ahead. "Something attacks us, you're getting eaten first."

"Arigatou, Neko, for your concern for my personal safety."

"Anytime," Dani replied, continuing to grin like a maniac. Skye just rolled her eyes and began to head into the forest.

The two girls trekked through the forest, climbing over the dense underbrush and fallen trees.

"Oh my God, SKYE LOOK!" the light brunette exclaimed running to the left while dogging low branches. The green-eyed girl quickly followed and arrived next to her shorter friend just in time to see a ball of light duck into a huge tree… a rotten, decaying giant of a tree blocking the entrance to a weird clearing, having probably fallen over many months prior to our young teen's arrival.

"Danielle, it's probably just a firefly." Skye said, pondering how a tree that large could have possibly fallen; short of by the gods or whatever higher being's will. While Skye began to have visions of a man in a toga throwing a lightening bolt and frying the tree, all in chibi style of course, Dani began to climb onto the trunk and look into the hole the Tinkerbelle wanna-be disappeared into.

"Danielle, what… are you doing?" Skye said, finally noticing her friend's movement.

"Skye, that ain't no firefly, that thing was the size of my fist! Plus, fireflies only come out at dusk." The stubborn girl once again stuck her head back into the three-foot wide hole.

"Neko, have you ever heard the saying, 'Curiosity killed the cat'."

"Yeah…" the teenager replied, head still in the hole, causing her voice to sound distant.

"Well, who's the cat in this situation?"

"Skye, that's just one of those fake fortune cookie sayings, they aren't really tru-OH SHHHIIIIITTTT!" The rotten bark broke under her weight, widening the previously three-foot hole into a seven-foot hole, as the black-eyed girl was sent down to the dark damp inside of the hole, or technically tree.

"DANI!" Skye dashed (ANG- dash….interesting word…) over to her fallen comrade.

"You alive, Cat?" Skye asked, looking into the dark abyss which swallowed her friend.

"Go to hell, Skye," was the reply from the hole, which might I add, sounded very pissed off.

"I'll take that as a yes…" Skye laughed, smiling down at her friend, which she still could not see. She apparently found this whole thing very amusing. Sadly her friend did not share her amusement.

"Just get me out of here!" cried the exasperated girl, glancing around suspiciously, not trusting this hole.

"Sure, hang on a second, any ideas of what I can use to get you out?" Skye replied, as calm and soothing as hell, as she somehow was in certain random situations, while she looked around into the clearing to see if there was any sort of rope-type object she could possibly use to get her friend out.

"Nope."

"Well, aren't you _such _a big help?" Skye responded, leaning over the hole.

"And damn proud of it! Oh, and Skye, I wouldn't get too close to the edge."

"Huh?" The girl replied, scooting closer to the edge in a vain attempt in hearing her friend.

"I said, DON'T GET TOO CLOSE TO THE EDGE!"

"Oh, okay," Skye began inching herself back until…/CRACK/

"FFFFUUUCCCCCKKK!" Both girls' screams rang throughout the forest, causing birds to take flight, andthe squirrels to pause in their daily acorn burying. This also included our oh-so-popular elf-boy clad in green, who just happened to be walking through the forest during this particular time of day.

The girls lay motionless, most of the bark of the tree now caved in over and around them. Well, mostly on Danielle because Skye, though not able to see her, apparently landed right on top of her comrade along with about 30 more pounds of decaying bark.

* * *

"Mmmmmm…" Danielle slowly opened her eyes. After minutes of her vision being exceptionally blurry and completely disoriented, she realized she was staring at the same familiar devil tree that previously swallowed herself and her companion. Her arms were tied behind her back, bound to something else that she was leaning on and was leaning on her. Her legs stretched out in front of her were also bound together. She noticed she was covered with bandages, small cuts, and bruises,anda head splitting pain emitting from her head. 

_Well moving sure as hell is gonna be fun_. She shifted her weight from side to side, and wiggled a little, testing how strong her restraints are without tipping off who ever caused this bondage that she was awake.

_I wonder where Skye is…_ Just as she finished her thought, she felt the pressure of whatever was leaning on her head shift to her shoulder. Turning her head slightly, she saw Skye's head, resting peacefully on her shoulder fast asleep, and drooling, too.

_Speak of the devil……ewww this is way beyond any level of sanitary code left in this world._ She shook her shoulder softly, vainly trying to remove her friend's head.

_I wonder if this is what it felt like when I wouldn't move my leg from her face during one of our Toonami nights… but I got to admit, it was a nice mini foot rest, though I could have done without the complaining and constant back talking._ She looked on at her friend's head, sweatdropping like never before.

_Ok, now to find out what the hell happened… _Dani began inching herself around, trying to see what lay behind her. As she did so, Skye's head began rolling slightly.

"…But mom, I don't want to go to school…" Skye mumbled, as Danielle prayed to God that no one heard.

"Skye, shut up," Danielle whispered to her half conscious friend.

"…But I don't wanna…" Skye said, louder this time.

"Skye, shut up!" Dani somehow whispered hoarsely.

"NEVER!" Skye screamed, failing her arms, or attempting to. What she ended up doing was throwing herself and her friend three feet away from their original position, landing in a crumpled heap on their sides in one of the most awkward and pretzel-like positions known to man. Even luckier for Danielle, since Skye had thrown herself backwards, Dani's face was now planted in the ground with the oh-so light Skye on top of her. She heard the shuffling of feet slowly approaching, but they suddenly stopped.

Danielle tilted her head slightly upward, enabling herself to see a pair of dark brown leather boots. I'm not talking about any Gouchi or other crap-boots, but REAL old fashioned medieval brown boots!

_What kind of freak is this?_ She thought silently as the boot slowly reached forth and… poked her.

"You awake?" a young masculine voice asked.

_What self-respecting teenage guy wears this crap?_ She pondered as she began slowly looking up, taking in all of his clothing sword and all, finding something about it very, very familiar.

"…Or even alive…?"

"Barely…" The black-eyed girl replied, finally meeting his gaze.

**Ten… Nine… Eight… Seven… Six… Five… Four… Three… Two… One**

"HOLY SHIT."

**Lift off! We have lift off!**

The shocked girl threw herself backwards into a sitting position, attempting to back away in vain hope that that would make the male that stood before her vanish or possibly change appearance.

"Holy shit, holy shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit." /deep breath/

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. This is a dream, just a dream. I shall open my eyes and he will be gone. Ok, yeah, good plan…. on the count of three. One. Two. Three." Danielle opened her eyes once again to find the blonde boy standing there, both eyebrows raised, looking quite confused and disturbed. Danielle stared at him some more before doing the only thing she could think of…

"SKYE!"

"Ow, what the fuck? Why the hell did you just head butt me, and why aren't my arms and legs responding! I'M PARALYZED!" Skye screamed out, desperately wiggling around in hopes of getting her defiant limbs to move. What she failed to notice was that they were not 'defiant', but merely tied up.

"SKYE YOU'RE NOT PARALYZED!"

"I'm not?"

"No, you're not."

"Then why won't they MOVE!" Skye cried, squirming.

"Oh, I don't know… but it could possibly have to do with THE ROPES THAT ARE TYING THEM TOGETHER."

"There are ropes tying them together?" Skye repeated, apparently amazed by this suggestion and still completely oblivious to everything surrounding her.

/sigh/

"Skye look down."

"Oh, well, will you look at that! There _are_ ropes!"

"No shit."

"Ok, one more question."

"What?" Danielle replied, exasperated and beyond tired.

"Why are we tied up?" Dani looked at her with her typical blank expression, her mind processing how big of an idiot her friend could be, while Skye was as calm and serious as ever, oh, and still completely oblivious to MOST of her surroundings.

_Only Skye._

"Skye, look a little further to the left…"

"Hmm… who's that?" Oh, look, the sweatdrops have returned.

"Skye, FOR ONCE IN YOUR SAD, SAD LIFE, LOOK AROUND YOU!" Skye took her friend's advice and slowly observed her surroundings. They were on one side of a small clearing with a small campsite in the middle. Opposite them, clear across the clearing, grazed a horse, a liver chestnut with cream mane and tail, which immediately looked up to meet Skye's gaze. Skye continued to look around the clearing until the familiar hell tree caught her sight.

"BAD TREE!" the green-eyed girl screamed, glaring at it freely, recalling what happened earlier. While in the background Danielle's sweatdrops just had kids.

"Skye look closely." The teenage boy began to shift his weight from foot to foot, uncomfortable under the strange girls' direct stares. They were just girls, harmless right? At least that's what he thought, and he couldn't have been more wrong. The arrival of these two 'innocent and angelic' girls is about to turn his world upside down and stomped repeatedly on.

"LEOGOLAS LOOK ALIKE!" Skye screamed, squirming violently.

_I knew I should have never shown her that movie_… /sigh/

"No Skye, it's not a Legolas look alike. Look closer…"

_**3 minutes later**_

"I still say it's some Legolas copy-cat"

"For Christ's sake Skye, think! THINK!" Danielle started shaking herself, therefore shaking Skye, in hopes of making her realize that the elf in front of them was NOT our beloved bow-bearing Fellowship member.

"Ok screw that, what's your name?"

"…Link…" Danielle and Link both stared expectantly at Skye…

"…"

**_2 minutes later_**

"I remember him!" The sweatdrops now have grandkids…

"And…" Danielle looked at Skye trying to get some reaction, but Skye just continued to stare blankly at her... Skye then hurriedly looked back at Link and realization hit her…

"HOLY SHIT!" Yeah, she figured it out, but once again at the expense of Dani's face being buried in the ground.

* * *

"I HATE YOU." 

"I love you too, darling!"

"I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL."

"Oh yay! I hear the weather this time of year is to die for! Get it DIE!" The green-eyed girl laughed to herself, while her friend, not finding it as amusing, just rolled her eyes and scoffed. (AMG- Have you ever tried to scoff? Real people just can't do it right, it's like glaring.)

"How is SHE untied and not me…"

"Because I'm just so loveable!" Skye continued babbling forming a never-ending list of "ables".

"And huggable, and snuggable, and…"

"You didn't take your medicine did you?"

"NOPE!"

"Shoot me now…"

"That is one option," The teenage boy clad in green replied monotonously, glancing down at the tied victim and walking towards his horse, which he began to saddle. In the mean time, Dani sat there glaring daggers at his back. He just went on like nothing was wrong humming softly to himself. Meanwhile, Skye sat on the log rocking back in forth and smirking triumphantly at her friend.

Danielle growled. "When will I be untied?"

Link just casually shrugged his shoulders, not even glancing at the girl. "When I feel like it."

"UGH! YOU STUPID BOY! UNTIE ME NOW!"

"Nope, don't feel like it yet, and your screaming isn't helping to change that."

"ARRGG!"

"You shouldn't be so violent. He probably would have untied you long ago if you'd just stop threatening and cussing at him and your appearance might also contribute to it too."

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT I HAVE BLACK EYES AND DECIDED TO WEAR A BLACK CAMI AND BLACK SHORTS YESTERDAY! I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WE'D BE SENT TO A WORLD WHERE BLACK IS AN EVIL DEVIL-SENT COLOR!"

"It's called expecting the unexpected."

"Fuck off."

Skye 'maturely' stuck her tongue out her friend in a sad retaliation against Dani's last remark.

Link then turned to the dark brunette and raised an eyebrow. "We have to leave now…"

"YAY!"

"Does that mean I get untied?"

"No."

"Then how am I going to walk?" Link then began approaching Dani with a dagger.

"Umm… what's that for?" He remained silent as he knelt down, and in a flash of silver, Dani's ankle bindings were cut.

"I thought you said I wasn't going to be untied?" She asked as she began moving her feet while doing a mental happy dance that she could now move her legs.

"And you aren't."

"Then what do you call cutting off the ropes off my feet then?"

"Enabling you to walk."

"…"

Link got up and yanked the girl to her feet, not so gently might I add. He then walked over to his saddle bag and produced two loaves of bread. "Here." The blond tossed one to Skye, who immediately began gulping it down, and then proceeded to eat his own.

"I don't get one, do I?" The hungry girl asked, looking longingly at her friend's bread.

"Nope."

"I feel loved."

"You should." Link finished off his bread and told Skye to get on the horse. Skye eagerly jumped on to Epona, while Link got another rope from his saddlebag. He walked over to Danielle and tied one end of the rope to her hands, and then walked back to the chestnut's saddle and tied the other end there. He swung his leg over and got on in front of Skye, while Dani's brain was processing what was happening, and once done…

"OH HELL NO!" Danielle began yanking furiously at the ropes, while Link just calmly kicked his horse. Off they went, with Dani cussing and struggling the whole way.

_**2 hours later**_

Skye was now turned backwards on the horse and was feeding Danielle bread. Every so often when Link would glance back at them, Skye would immediately hide her loaf and rest her elbows on her knees while looking off boredly into the distance and Dani would immediately stare down at her oh-so beautiful Nike tennis shoes. This continued on for awhile, Link knowing perfectly well what was conspiring, but being the nice guy he is, let it slide. And just for his amusement, he continued to glance back every so often so it wouldn't be too easy for them.

Soon, however, this entertainment was put to an end, as they arrived at the entrance to a maze. Link immediately dismounted with our green-eyed heroine following close behind.

"Do I get untied now!" Link remained silent, just glancing at the girl before he returned to rummaging through his saddle bag. He once again pulled out the dagger and walked towards the tied up girl. He cut the ropes that held her wrists as the girl began to flail and stretch her arms, jumping up and down in happiness.

"I'M FREE!" The smaller girl began to leap around excitedly. Think about it this way, if you hadn't been to separate your hands for the past two days, you would be prancing, too!

"So where are we going again?" The taller girl asked.

Dani paused in her jumping to stare blankly at her friend. "Dude, don't you remember, this is the entrance to the Forest Temple."

* * *

**Again I apologize for not updating sooner. Oh, and I give partial credit to my editor DeathMeetsLife! (PET THE NINJA) Oh, and I would love some feedback...my friends are having WAY too much fun reviewing my stories. **


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